Cake baker refuses to make $1000 cake for sister’s wedding, sister is offended when she outsources the job: ‘I do not give gifts that expensive'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jun 20, 2024 6:00 PM EDT

If you've ever bought a custom cake, you know that they tend to cost way more than you might expect them to cost. You think, "It's just sugar, eggs, and flour, right? Why do I feel like applying for a loan at the bank?" But cake is an art, and art takes time. 

Cake decorators are so creative now that you can't even recognize some of them as things you can eat. They look like museum-quality sculptures or exact replicas of everyday objects. (They have a whole Netflix show dedicated to finding out if something is cake or not). Wedding cakes are especially expensive because, well, everything wedding-related is expensive. So when a baker's sister asked for a huge favor, she had some strong feelings about it. But her family quickly turned against her, and drama ensued. Read on for the story, and decide for yourself just who is in the wrong. 

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  • 01
    Ling Party DER OF EVENTS • GRAND ENTRANCE COCKTAIL/SOCIAL HOUR PHOTOS pm 0 pm .00 pm IST DANCE/DINNER 7:00 pm ⚫ TOAST & CAKE 8:00 pm • DANCING 10:00 pm ⚫ LAST DANCE 10:30 pm PARTY THE NIGHT AWAY Ml
    via Kadyn Pierce
  • 02
    AITA for giving my sister a wedding cake made by one of my assistants instead of making her one myself.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 03
    My grandmother made wedding cakes for everyone I knew growing up. I learned how to do everything from her. I would make roses out of playdough while she made them from fondant. My sister was never interested. I have turned my memories of my grandmother into a business.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 04
    I make wedding cakes. And I charge a fair bit for them. As an example my base price is $8 a slice. So if you have 100 guests you will be buying an $800 cake. One of my base models. In return you will get a delicious cake with piped decorations.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 05
    At $17.50 a slice you get my top notch work. Hand molded flowers and the whole deal. Yes I know it is expensive. Nobody is forced to buy one of my cakes. There are many very good bakers in my city.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 06
    My sister is getting married. It is kind of a last minute thing. She came with my mom to talk to me about making her wedding cake like two weeks ago. Very last minute. I said there was no way as I had other clients that were ahead of her. My mom got mean and said that I had to do this. After a while I relented. I love my sister even though she is an impulsive pain in the
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 07
    I said I could do it for about $1,000 for what she wanted. That is much less than I would charge anyone else. There is no profit in that at all. She wanted a very elaborate cake with a lot of decoration.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 08
    OH GIFT. NO IT'S GOING TO BE A I do not give gifts that expensive. I am not rich. I will have to eat the material costs and the wages for my helpers as is.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 09
    I did not want to argue any more so I said that I would make her a basic cake. Still very nice. I did not budge. I do not negotiate about losing money.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 10
    I actually though about outsourcing to a really great Filipino baker I know that could do it cheap. It would cost me $300 and I could concentrate on my clients.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 11
    I ended up just letting one of my apprentices do the cake. It was for my sister so I double checked everything. And I did the decorations on the top tier. The one the couple saves to have on their anniversary.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 12
    The cake was a hit and many pictures were taken. I told them NOT to mention that I did the cake. It was not really up to par. They did not listen. I had a client that knew my sister. She asked and I was honest. My sister found out she got a cake make by my helper. It has caused a huge fight.
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 13
    I think it would have been better if they had just gone elsewhere. They are I that I did not spend days sculpting the cake just for them. AITA?
    via u/Queasy_Hyena_7297
  • 14
    fallingintopolkadots 16 hr. ago NTA. This is how you make your living and you have employees and clients booked well enough in advance and willing to pay your asking price, and your sister decides to get married suddenly and quickly and you're supposed to drop everything (so, scrimp on the quality of the paying clients) and whip up an elaborate cake for her for free? Nope!
    via u/fallingintopolkadots
  • 15
    Prestigious-Maybe-73. 16 hr. ago NTA. They wanted you to screw over paying clients on short notice? So the gift would have cost you money and your professional reputation? Nope. And you did do the top layer. That was a class act.
    via u/Prestigious-Maybe-73
  • 16
    Cavolatan 16 hr. ago • If there'd been a normal amount of lead in I might have been ambivalent about this, but "hey can we have a cake in two weeks and can it be free" catapults us squarely into NTA zone
    via u/Cavolatan
  • 17
    hellcoach 15 hr. ago NTA. Your mother and sister are acting so entitled. Making it free and with tight time constraints are already huge asks. Since the cake was a hit anyway (before the truth came out), kudos should be given to your assistant for a job well done.
    via u/hellcoach
  • 18
    sraydenk 8 hr. ago • ESH. Family for assuming you would make a cake for free.
    via u/sraydenk
  • 19
    You for outsourcing the cake without telling them and gifting them a cake you don't want to be associated with. If it wasn't up to par and you didn't want linked to you, then you shouldn't have provided it. It's not like you can control every guest
    via u/sraydenk
  • 20
    from taking a photo or talking about the cake. If it was truly inspected by you and up to your standards you shouldn't cake if you are linked to it.
    via u/sraydenk
  • 21
    camkats 8 hr. ago • ESH while I understand that these take lots of time, I also make cakes and if you have $1k in ingredients something is off. However there should not have been an expectation 2 weeks before the wedding for you to do this. I think you should know that they are going to want you to do the cake. It wasn't a 5th cousin, it was your sister.
    via u/camkats

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cake family drama gifts wedding party wedding cakes sisters baking gift cake toppers wedding wedding cake family birthday cake sister reddit thread little sister Reddit weddings money
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